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    To seek that love and meeting of needs from someone else has only left me feeling disappointed, resentful, hurt and depleted. So at 41, I’ve decided that I’m done with having a broken heart. Once you know what it’s like to be in a mature relationship, you may decide to never date men your age again. Find companions for your companions, and steer the boat of love to safe harbor.

    Approach avoidance dating

    The start of our relationship was made in heaven: there was a lot of love and infatuation.

    Suddenly after two months, everything was off, as he needed some “personal space.” We ended our relationship, but reconciled two months later.

    Once he calls, he doesn't mention our last date or what we've talked about, and then when we go out the next time it feels that we're beginning to get to know each other all over again.

    This has happened at least four times in the past three months.

    Anxiety becomes a problem when it leads to avoidance.It seems as if he struggles to get closer to you emotionally, but once he does he has to retreat because he doesn't know how to deal with the closeness.I’ve said before that I don’t care about approach anxiety. When social anxiety becomes a problem, it’s because it turns into more than just a feeling of anxiety in social situations (like approach anxiety).What is is specifically about social anxiety that causes problems?The primary factor is that it makes you avoid the possibility of being judged, and you feel anxious and avoidant in situations where you might be judged or rejected.

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